First thing: This is a double whammy in a good way---American Idol is over and Simon Cowell is no longer going to be in the mainstream TV circuit for a while. I hate this guy. One might think that it's because he's a condescending, arrogant, elitist, jerk, smug, mean, pompous, boorish, English (that's right, I went there) and just a downright awful person.......and if you thought that, you would be wrong. I hate him because he looks like this:
The guy is a complete and utter tool. He's worth, like, a gazillion dollars and that's the best haircut he can come up with??? Seriously? He looks like he gets his hair cut at Supercuts (I didn't go with Great Clips because they are decent in a pinch) or tried to cut it himself, which is never a good thing to try. Just trust me. Please.
Simon also has some kind of fetish with not buttoning up his shirt all the way and revealing a lot of chest hair. Side note: The only person that I think can successfully pull this look off right now, besides me, is Bradley Cooper. He's my new man-crush, replacing George Clooney. After The Hangover, I knew it was time to switch it up. My only concern, and it's a big one, is that he's dating Renee Zellweger. He can do sooooooooooo (deep breath)0000000000 much better than RENEE ZELLWEGER. At least Clooney only dates/sleeps with hot women. My hope is that Cooper is only using her for some kind of career advantage. Although, I'm not sure what she could possibly bring to the table. Of course, she did also sleep with my other man-idol, Kenny Chesney, so maybe she's good at a lot of things I don't know about. I'm talking about in the bedroom, in case you were wondering what I meant. I know you were all thinking the same thing, too. Don't pretend like you weren't.
I can't believe I just spent the last 2 minutes writing about my man-crush on Bradley Cooper.
Where was I.....oh ya, my deep hatred of American Idol and Simon Cowell. Now that SC is done with the show, and the ratings have plummeted in recent years, and they haven't put out a good "idol" since Carrie Underwood....what's the point of this show? I guess this goes with my "I hate 99.9999% of all reality TV shows" mantra. Until February of this year(oddly coinciding with my move to Minneapolis....hhhhmmmm) I never watched any reality TV show. I think they are dumb and boring. I don't want to watch someone else's real life when mine is good enough to blog about.
There are only a few good/watchable reality shows on TV: Amazing Race, Dego Housewives of New Jersey* and Dego's living together in a beach house in New Jersey*. Amazing Race is great because it would be completely bad ass to go around the world and try to do those things without actually, physically killing your significant other in the process. Housewives is only good because it's a COMPLETE train wreck of women hating each other. These women are either 1)crazy or 2)stupid. It's just completely mind boggling how I keep watching it and how it stays on the air. Talk about OPP!!!!(other peoples problems--thank you Naughty by Nature) Jersey Shore is an entire blog posting all together and I'm not going there today.
*not the real name of the show. Dego is slang for "smelly, dirty, greasy Italian" which most of the women and men on these shows are.
I tried to watch The Bachelorette, but I couldn't get past the guys interviews at the beginning of the show. Be honest, if you had a guy friend that was on that show and he came across as a complete dumbass/idiot in the interview process on national TV, wouldn't you cross him off your "friends" list immediately? Yet, apparently, this must be popular with the ladies because this is about the 37th season it's been on the air.
The second thing that made my week: As I've mentioned before, I have a thing for funny billboards and bumper stickers. On my way home from Madison (which, as usual, did not disappoint) I saw a little green POS car with a bumper sticker that simply said, "EAT BERTHA'S MUSSELS". That's it. No address. No phone number. No picture. Nothing. I was both laughing and sad at the same time. Who the hell is Bertha and why are HER mussels soooo good that they have their own bumper sticker? I Googled it (I have a little free time at work, so sue me) and came to find out that it's a bar/restaraunt in Baltimore Maryland. It actually heralds itself as being famous for this bumper sticker. Who would have thought.....
You are all a little dumber for having just read that last paragraph. You're welcome.
HAVE A GREAT LONG MEMORIAL DAY WEEKEND!!! GO CUBS AND BLACKHAWKS!!!!!
No comments:
Post a Comment